Breakfast the Two-Hundred-and-Fourteenth

Fruit & Fibre and strawberries.

Today at the orthodontist I was issued with elastic bands for my braces. My tootlepegs hurt. But, the elastic band bag has a picture of an otter on it. AN OTTER. Hurrah! I love it. I want this on a T-shirt.

If ever you are in need of cheering, google "otters" and look at the images. Ordinarilly I find cute animal pictures disturbing, but somehow with otters it's ok. They make me want to become the new Gavin Maxwell.

Breakfast the Two-Hundred-and-Third

Banana and oats & honey crunchy thingy.

I munched this morning's breakfast on the hoof. And jolly tasty it was too. I got braces today (teeth, not trousers) so in 18 months, I shall have a dazzlingly perfect smile. Until that time, I will be mainly eating soft foods. And talking with a lisp.

Breakfast the One-Hundred-and-Nineteenth

Boiled eggs and toast (one slice with marmite).

I forgot to take my eggs out of the pan after silencing the timer, so they weren't everything they could have been... but they were still pretty tasty.

This evening I finally opened the welcome pack I was sent by my Mother's smart, hippyish dentist. I'm trying him out because most dentists terrify me (the result of the ministrations of the awful dentist I used to see at home). Having opened it, I sincerely hope that I require nothing done. The list of prices makes quite clear that I'm going to need to sell a kidney to have even a few fillings.

I'm still holding out for the day when they can regrow our teeth (seeing as most of mine are in fact amalgam). They managed it in mice a few years ago...

Breakfast the Eighty-Ninth

Strawberry, raspberry and banana smoothie. (Home-made.)

I had supper with the Mama this evening. Always delicious. And plentiful. I am now about three stone heavier, and edging ever closer to the early onset of Type 2 Diabetes.

For someone who severely curtailed my sugar intake as child, she certainly is making up for it now. This evening's fix came in the form of chocolate fairy cakes with peanut butter cream-cheese icing. Yum!

So desperate was I for sugar as a child that I used to sneak into the pantry and eat hundreds and thousands (that's sprinkles for you Americans) straight out of the box. I also used to eat my Dad's tooth-brushing power -- apparently even saccharin suited me.

Now that I think about it, I can't imagine where he bought this tooth powder from. Surely no one has sold anything like this since about 1894. It was probably some tremendously toxic confection that had been lurking at the back of a cupboard for 100 years.  (I can always rely on my Father to be making use of things the Edwardians would have considered outmoded.) I remember it came in a round container and to use it you dabbed a wet toothbrush (or pre-licked finger) in...

Breakfast the Thirty-Seventh

Toast with pear & apple spread.

Recently I've been feeling very peeved that my parents didn't turn me into a child star. I'm sure I'd have sidestepped the descent into drug-addiction and kleptomania that seems to afflict most former silver-screen cherubs and instead I'd be starring in all sorts interesting things. I bet I'd have much nicer teeth too. If I have a daughter, I'm putting her on the stage.